In a world where everything is ridiculous, nothing can be ridiculed. You cannot unmask a mask.

The truth is that there are no things for which men will make such herculean efforts as the things of which they know they are unworthy.

Let a man walk ten miles steadily on a hot summer's day along a dusty English road, and he will soon discover why beer was invented.

Truths turn into dogmas the minute they are disputed.

children are simply human beings who are allowed to do what everyone else really desires to do, as for instance, to fly kites, or when seriously wronged to emit prolonged screams for several minutes.

Drink because you are happy, but never because you are miserable. Never drink when you are wretched without it, or you will be like the grey-faced gin-drinker in the slum; but drink when you would be happy without it, and you will be like the laughing peasant of Italy. Never drink because you need it, for this is rational drinking, and the way to death and hell. But drink because you do not need it, for this is irrational drinking, and the ancient health of the world.

Faith is always at a disadvantage; it is a perpetually defeated thing which survives all conquerors.