These are ideas that work for many, and that may well reflect your true understanding of life.
Gish JenMany women tend toward the interdependent end of things, we tend to see ourselves in relationship to others to a far greater degree than men.
Gish JenThat there should be a purpose to suffering, that a person should be chosen for it, special - these are houses of the mind, in which whole peoples have found shelter.
Gish JenIt's a matter of whether you see the self as fundamentally in relationship to other selves or not - whether you see the boundary between self and the world as relatively permeable, which makes you "interdependent" (collectivist) in outlook, or relatively impermeable, which makes you "independent" (individualistic).
Gish Jen