TV—a clever contraction, derived from the words Terrible Vaudeville. We call it a medium, because nothing's well done.

I keep reading between the lies.

Politics makes estranged bedfellows.

I have discovered the secret formula for a carefree old age: iycri = fi (if you can't recall it, forget it).

The best cure for hypochondria is to forget about your body and get interested in somebody else's.

They call television a medium because nothing's well done.

You know, my father died of cancer when I was a teenager. He had it before it became popular.