A nun, at best, is only half a woman, just as a priest is only half a man.

The objection of the scandalmonger is not that she tells of racy doings, but that she pretends to be indignant about them.

Hygiene is the corruption of medicine by morality. It is impossible to find a hygienist who does not debase his theory of the healthful with a theory of the virtuous. ... The aim of medicine is surely not to make men virtuous; it is to safeguard them from the consequences of their vices.

Capitalism under democracy has a further advantage: its enemies, even when it is attacked, are scattered and weak, and it is usually easily able to array one half of them against the other half, and thus dispose of both.

Well, I tell you, if I have been wrong in my agnosticism, when I die I'll walk up to God in a manly way and say, Sir, I made an honest mistake.

Without a doubt there are women who would vote intelligently. There are also men who knit socks beautifully.

When I hear artists or authors making fun of businessmen, I think of a regiment in which the band makes fun of the cooks.