Government is actually the worst failure of civilized man.

Of learned men, the clergy show the lowest development of professional ethics. Any pastor is free to cadge customers from the divines of rival sects, and to denounce the divines themselves as theological quacks.

A wealthy man is one who earns $100 a year more than his wife's sister's husband.

Every complex problem has a simple solution that doesn't work.

Philosophy consists very largely of one philosopher arguing that all others are jackasses. He usually proves it, and I should add that he also usually proves that he is one himself.

Happiness is the china shop; love is the bull.

Life without sex might be safer but it would be unbearably dull