The curse of man, and the cause of nearly all his woe, is his stupendous capacity for believing the incredible.

Psychotherapy is the theory that the patient will probably get well anyhow and is certainly a damn fool.

A poet more than thirty years old is simply an overgrown child.

He marries best who puts it off until it is too late.

All the political seers and sorcerers seem to be agreed that the coming Presidential campaign will be full of bitterness, and that most of it will be caused by religion. I count Prohibition as a part of religion, for it has surely become so in the United States. The Prohibitionists, seeing all their other arguments destroyed by the logic of events, have fallen back upon the mystical doctrine that God is somehow on their side, and that opposing them thus takes on the character of blasphemy.

There comes a day of public ceremonial, and a chance to make a speech.... A million voters with IQs below 60 have their ears glued to the radio. It takes four days' hard work to concoct a speech without a sensible word in it. Next a dam must be opened somewhere. Four dry Senators get drunk and make a painful scene. The Presidential automobile runs over a dog. It rains.

The law is a sort of hocus-pocus science that smiles in your face while it picks your pocket.