There comes a day of public ceremonial, and a chance to make a speech.... A million voters with IQs below 60 have their ears glued to the radio. It takes four days' hard work to concoct a speech without a sensible word in it. Next a dam must be opened somewhere. Four dry Senators get drunk and make a painful scene. The Presidential automobile runs over a dog. It rains.

The music critic, Huneber, could never quite make up his mind about a new symphony until he had seen the composer's mistress.

The truly civilized man is always skeptical and tolerant, in this field as in all others. His culture is based on 'I am not too sure'.

The way to hold a husband is to keep him a little jealous; the way to lose him is to keep him a little more jealous.

Human progress is furthered, not by conformity, but by aberration.

The feelings that Beethoven put into his music were the feelings of a god. There was something olympian in his snarls and rages, and there was a touch of hellfire in his mirth.

The only way that a government can provide for jobs for all citizens is by deciding what every man should do.