We've got to keep 6 billion people happy without destroying our planet. It's the biggest challenge we've ever faced....but we're taking it on.

You are always a little bit wrong

Making an un-perfect decision is far, far better than not making a decision, which is the worst possible decision you could make.

So the president is like, "Well, once upon a time it was Congress's job to decide whether or not we attacked countries, so let's let them decide." Which is funny, because, as we all know, if Congress were on fire, Congress could not pass the "Pour Water on Congress Act".

You may be wondering why there are words on my hands. That's because I'm a dork. And I'm gonna choose not to explain myself.

Some days, it seems to me like the purpose of life is to convert energy into beauty.

Bravery is not strength in the face of a far lesser foe. Bravery is the exact opposite of that.