It's like being on the Titanic and seeing there's only one lifeboat left.

When I heard the draw I was out on the golf course. I had an eight-iron in one hand and my mobile in the other. When we came out with United, my club went further than the ball.

It's like being on the Titanic and seeing there's only one lifeboat left.

Luckily they had a stupid on their side too.

I tape over most of them with Corrie or Neighbours. Most of them are crap. They can f***ing make anyone look good. I signed Marco Boogers off a video. He was a good player but a nutter. They didn't show that on the video.

I left a couple of my foreigners out last week and they started talking in foreign. I knew they were saying "Blah, blah, blah, le bastard manager..."

He's disappeared to Azerbaijan, or somewhere ridiculous in the world.