I love Americans, but not when they try to talk French. What a blessing it is that they never try to talk English.

Poverty keeps together more homes than it breaks up.

All decent people live beyond their incomes; those who aren't respectable live beyond other people's; a few gifted individuals manage to do both.

Find yourself a cup; the teapot is behind you. Now tell me about hundreds of things.

To be clever in the afternoon argues that one is dining nowhere in the evening.

A little inaccuracy sometimes saves a ton of explanation.

I hate posterity - it's so fond of having the last word.