All my life I've been an obese man trapped inside a fat man's body.
Union Rule 26: Every employee must win 'Worker of the Week' at least once, regardless of gross incompetence, obesity or rank odor.
Be still my heart; thou hast known worse than this.
All deaths are hateful to miserable mortals, but the most pitiable death of all is to starve.
Thou shalt not take moochers into thy hut?
There is not any advantage to be won from grim lamentation.