I learned a long time ago that reality was much weirder than anyone's imagination.

Nixon was so crooked that he needed servants to help him screw his pants on every morning.

Nixon was a bad loser. He hated losing worse than death, and that is why I enjoyed him. We were both football fans, both addicts; and on some days, nothing else mattered.

Good people drink good beer.

Smart people understand that there is no such thing as paranoia. It is just another mask for ignorance.

I hate to advocate drugs, alcohol, violence, or insanity to anyone, but they've always worked for me.

If you have half a story and you don't know the rest, you use what you have to pry the rest out of someone.