Sportswriters are a rude and brainless subculture of fascist drunks, a gang of vicious monkeys jerking off in a zoo cage... more disgusting by nature than maggots oozing out the carcass of a dead animal.

Journalism, to me, is just another drug - a free ride to scenes I'd probably miss if I stayed straight.

I will fight for your right to be weird- just as I know you will fight for mine.

I have a theory that the truth is never told during the nine-to-five hours.

Never turn your back on fear. It should always be in front of you, like a thing that might have to be killed.

Yes sir, I am a tortured man for all seasons, as they say, and I have powerful friends in high places. Birds sing where I walk, and children smile when they see me coming.

There is nothing in the world more helpless and irresponsible and depraved than a man in the depths of an ether binge.