I’ll read my books and I’ll drink coffee and I’ll listen to music, and I’ll bolt the door.

But it wasn't just that he was the most intelligent member in the family. He was also the nicest, in lots of ways. He never got mad at anybody. People with red hair are supposed to get mad very easily, but Allie never did, and he had very red hair.

I am always saying "Glad to've met you" to somebody I'm not at all glad I met. If you want to stay alive, you have to say that stuff, though.

That's something that annoys the hell out of me-I mean if somebody says the coffee's all ready and it isn't.

Mothers are all slightly insane.

Most stuff that is genuine is better left unsaid.

People always clap for the wrong reasons.