I've never laughed a woman into bed, but I've laughed one out of bed many times.

I bought one of those anti-bullying wristbands when they first came out. I say 'bought', I actually stole it off a short, fat ginger kid.

For the first six months of my stand-up career, I was talking like Danny Dyer. I was doing a lot of 'alright guvnors?' It wasn't true to who I was.

I hope people think of me as a bit older. I do have a beard. That makes me look very old.

I think people respect honesty rather than hiding it.

I've never laughed a woman into bed, but I've laughed one out of bed many times.

Oh, you wanna do a little bit of roleplay? Could you just play dead?