Now, granted, there are still as many heartbreaking things going on. There are so many things in the Obama administration to be sick over that certainly didn't change. And also our media, if it's possible, seems to be getting even worse. The alleged news media. And then there are the teabag racists adding insult to injury. But I don't have that same heartbreak anymore, because it's not fresh heartbreak anymore. It's like I'm used to it. I'm sure we all are just used to it.

I think we all remember where we were when Rush Hour hit the water. That was an important day.

Rejection kills, disappointment only maims.

Last night, I went to a birthday party, and this girl brought a cake and a cheesecake. And the other girls that lived in the apartment, I swear to God, all night long: 'You're taking that cake with you when you go. That cake's not staying in this house.' Like it's this evil, Hope Diamond, nuclear, horrifying cursed thing.

The directing thing, to do it well, I think you have to have a hell of a lot more discipline than I do, or be a lot more willing to really take charge of whole large group of people than I feel comfortable doing - because a director really has to run everything, and be very confident in their ability to do so.

I would have to say loneliness is next to uncleanliness.

As you can tell from watching the show, I'm not a strong joke writer per se.