Pedestrian's rights - because we live in California, I've got to address this issue. I don't know where on the fence I am about that. I suppose if I'm walking, I'm all for it, but if I'm driving, that's a whole other can of worms.

Sex is the quickest way to ruin a friendship.

For my stand-up, I always have my notebook with me and if something strikes me, I'll write it down.

You have to have a lot more dedication to what I'll call 'the machine,' ... I have 20 percent dedication. What's needed is 110 percent. You can't have it with the level of apathy I have.

If you aren't overly effusive or really nicey-nice with the press, you get a reputation for being outspoken or difficult.

I don't know who you're referring to exactly who said, 'What has Iraq done to us?'

I don't even know why somebody's Twittering as me. I don't understand it, and I wish that it would stop. But there's nothing that can be done. It's so terrible.