It's not the pizza, darlin', its my masculine presence." Joe Morelli

I mostly eat peanut butter sandwiches. Peanut butter and banana, peanut butter and jelly, peanut butter and potato chips, peanut butter and olives, and peanut butter and marshmallow goo. So sue me, I like peanut butter.

I wasn’t sure anymore what made a good marriage. There had to be love, of course, but there were so many different kinds of love. And clearly, some love was more enduring than others.

I attributed the incidence to temporary insanity, and in my own defense, I'd like to say I haven't run over anyone since.

Give me the gun." Ranger said. I extracted the gun from my pants and handed it over. Ranger held the gun in the pulm of his hand and smiled. "It's warm," he said. He put the gun in the glove compartment and plugged the key into the ignition. Am I fired?" No. Any women who can heat up a gun like that is worth keeping around.

Well, sure, but I don't bring God into it. I think shower massage might have been invented by the devil. God invented the missionary position.

If God had wanted me to lose weight he would have made sure there was creamed spinach for dessert.