Sometimes choice is a luxury that fate does not afford us.

I've got six months to sort out the hackers, get the Japanese knotweed under control and find an acceptable form of narcissus.

I would so hate to be a first-person character! Always on your guard, always having people read your thoughts!

Everything comes to an end. A good bottle of wine, a summer’s day, a long-running sitcom, one’s life, and eventually our species. The question for many of us is not that everything will come to an end but when. And can we do anything vaguely useful until it does?

Who do readers expect to see when they pick up this book? Who has won the Most Troubled Romantic Lead at the BookWorld Awards seventy-seven times in a row? Me. All me.

Ill-fitting grammar are like ill-fitting shoes. You can get used to it for a bit, but then one day your toes fall off and you can't walk to the bathroom.

The best plans are always the simplest.