The White House softball team played the pro-marijuana lobbyists' team and lost 25-3. Still no word yet on which side President Obama played for.

The car was the iPhone of the 20th century. Kids these days don't have to drive anymore. They just go there virtually.

Soup is just a way of screwing you out of a meal.

When you work with your hands, you learn to appreciate how easy it is to earn money talking.

If you're a gunfighter, you like to die in the street.

General Colin Powell shocked a lot of people in Washington by speaking out against President Bush's policies, saying that the world is beginning to doubt the moral basis of our fight against terrorism. That's what I think he said - it was hard to hear him because he was being hustled out of the room to his cell in Guantanamo Bay.

President Bush's campaign is now attacking John Kerry for throwing away some of his medals to protest the Vietnam War. Bush did not have any medals to throw away, but in his defense he did have all his services records thrown out.