They had so much rain in New York that a lot of the cabbies had their first shower in years.

You know, it shows how old I am. I can remember the good old days when the president picked the Supreme Court justices instead of the other way around.

You know what really makes this embarrassing? The other day the president said the leaders in Iraq are 'ready to take off the training wheels.' That's what he said, 'take off the training wheels.' Then he goes out and falls off his bicycle. And they wonder why the rest of the world doesn't take us seriously.

At the Sharper Image store, I saw a body fat analyzer. Didn't that used to be called a mirror?

Big news on CNN, a search has uncovered illegal biochemical agents, toxins and other dangerous substances. Not in Iraq, in Rush Limbaugh's medicine cabinet.

It's casual Friday, which means that at the White House, they're casually going through everybody's phone calls and records.

I don't know why it's so hard to believe women. You to go Saudi Arabia and you need two women to testify against a man. Here you need 25.