The Stock Market was down today. Two major businesses declared bankruptcy, consumer spending is at an all time low - in other words, Bush is back on the job.

Did you know that 10% of all Americans have not had sex in 5 years? I didn't know there were so many Republicans.

Defense Secretary Donald Rumsfeld said this week there's a good chance we never get bin Laden. bin Laden! We couldn't even get O.J.!

It seems that researchers at Colorado University say wine may help people lose weight. It's not the wine directly that causes the weight loss, it's all the walking around you do trying to find your car.

Ashcroft went on to say that our way of life is being threatened by a group of radical religious fanatics who are armed and dangerous. And then he called for prayers in the schools and an end to gun control.

It looks like Rudy Giuliani is out of the race. Finally, a Republican with an exit strategy.

When Clinton said he was going to create 8 million new jobs, I didn't think they were all going to be tax collectors.