The Iraqis sat down for talks on how to put together a post-war government. They would have sat down yesterday, but somebody stole all their couches.
Jay LenoWhat's the difference between Lindsay Lohan and Rick Perry? It only takes Lindsay four and a half hours to finish a sentence.
Jay LenoPresident Obama said he is going to use the Gulf disaster to push a new energy bill through Congress. How about using the Gulf disaster to fix the Gulf disaster?
Jay LenoThe other night, President Bush's press conference was pre-empted by 'American Idol.' You know the difference between President Bush and 'American Idol?' See, on 'American Idol,' the one with the most votes wins.
Jay Leno