Things have really changed here in Hollywood. Used to be people in this town couldn't wait to get an envelope full of white powder.

Enron is now officially out of the energy business. They are now in a new business: confetti.

We are in a code orange. Homeland Security said earlier today that everyone should have a roll of duct tape and plastic sheeting to protect your house in event of terrorist attacks. Who came up with this idea? MacGyver?

Valentines day are coming up and a German company has made chokolate in shapes of couples making love. I don't like them... I don't want my chokolate to have more fun than me.

Today, one year after their divorce, Pamela and Tommy Lee announced they're getting back together. You know what that means? There's still hope for Ike and Tina Turner.

President Obama was in India yesterday visiting our jobs. Tomorrow he goes to China to visit our money.

The Iraqis sat down for talks on how to put together a post-war government. They would have sat down yesterday, but somebody stole all their couches.