I thought about the nice clothes that I always wore. Well of course I did. I took pride in being the best dressed monster in Dade County.

I don't know if you have noticed this, but it is quite possible for two human beings to have a conversation in which one or both parties involved has absolutely no idea what they're talking about.

What a terrible thing life can be.

Really now: If you can't get me my newspaper on time, how can you expect me to refrain from killing people?

And here I always thought morality was useless.

Life teaches us that human thought almost never walks hand in hand with logic, and it is usually counterproductive to raise the point.

Perhaps because I'll never be one, humans are interesting to me.