Movies are great, but the real romance happens right here somewhere as real close-up. Either you're the one erasing or you're the one being erased, so... It's not a pleasant feeling!

Lots of people say if you dredge too much stuff up, you'll go crazy - "You'll go insane!" But for a comedian, insanity is not a problem. It's a goal.

Every character is a baby. You can't choose between them. If you can, you didn't do your job. You have to fall in love with every character.

You are ready and able to do beautiful things in this world.

Magicians are definitely more arrogant. They're kind of like "Abra Kadabra, you're an idiot," they don't let you in on the joke. Comedians, you're always in on the joke unless it's Andy Kaufman.

As far as I can tell, it's just about letting the universe know what you want and then working toward it while letting go of how it comes to pass.

I spent most of my time in my room staring at a mirror. I never knew I was supposed to socialize. I just spent hours making faces at myself, having a good time.