Uh uh uh, turning the car into oncoming traffic... is counterproductive!

I hate Christmas. I do think it is odd that I have wound up playing these two iconic Christmas haters. It is the same story, in a way. Scrooge is the original Grinch. I think I am perfectly suited, because I have had some dark Christmases.

I'd like to thank my mother, my father, the Academy. I'm sorry. I was thinking of something else.

So many of us choose our path out of fear disguised as practicality.

Magicians are definitely more arrogant. They're kind of like "Abra Kadabra, you're an idiot," they don't let you in on the joke. Comedians, you're always in on the joke unless it's Andy Kaufman.

Movie offers are out there for me, I just don't hear them yet.

I expected that most of my career would be in dramatic acting. My hero was James Dean.