I hate Christmas. I do think it is odd that I have wound up playing these two iconic Christmas haters. It is the same story, in a way. Scrooge is the original Grinch. I think I am perfectly suited, because I have had some dark Christmases.

My life is not unlike Truman's. I can't go anywhere.

Behind every great man is a woman rolling her eyes.

In retrospect it always seems to work out that you can look back on something that was a disaster and find some gems in there.

Dry land is not a myth. I've seen it. Kevin Costner. Waterworld. I don't know what the big fuss is about. I saw that movie nine times. It rules!

I refuse to feel guilty. I feel guilty about too much in my life but not about money. I went through periods when I had nothing, so somebody in my family has to get stinkin' wealthy.

I think everybody should get rich and famous and do everything they ever dreamed of so they can see that it's not the answer.