It's hard for anybody who's been with me not to feel starved for affection when I'm making love to my ideas. Maybe it's not meant for me to settle down and be married.

My psychiatrist says I have a messiah complex. But I forgave him.

I would visualize things coming to me. It would just make me feel better. Visualization works if you work hard. That's the thing. You can't just visualize and go eat a sandwich.

Until Ace Ventura, no actor had considered talking through his ass.

I just wanna hang out. No big deal!

I don't think anybody should go through life without a team of psychologists. I have been through times when I'm literally squatting in the living room, having one of those open-throated cries, where you're crying all the way to your butthole. I always believed I would come out of it, though.

150 people die every year from being hit by falling coconuts. Not to worry, drug makers are developing a vaccine.