I didn't see much besides Melbourne and a quick trip down to the Twelve Apostles, but all the Aussies I encountered were good-spirited and had a fine sense of humor.

"Liberating" is a gay word, so let's phrase it this way: I know everything about me and still manage to be good friends with myself, so nothing anyone says that's truthful about me ever bothers me.

The average human's fundamental project is to find someone else to blame for their problems.

The idea that the reader is important enough to me that I'd tailor my words to either please or offend them always seems amusingly alien to me.

Though your major media kept smacking me upside the head with the word "multicultural," you goddamned Australians are the most racist bunch of people I've ever seen in my life.

My hatred is diamond-hard.

What's absolutely impossible to prove is the idea of innate and everlasting equality.