Check out the very best of Hollywood jokes that will make you laugh

Well, we can skip childhood because I didn't have any. Not one goddam moment on the Good Ship Lollipop.

Women's Lib? Poor little things. They always look so unhappy. Have you noticed how bitter their faces are?

Love is a fire. But whether it is going to warm your hearth or burn down your house, you can never tell.

Of all the actresses ... to me, only Faye Dunaway has the talent and the class and the courage it takes to make a real star.

If I weren't a Christian Scientist, and I saw "Trog" advertised on a marquee across the street, I'd think I'd contemplate suicide.

I think that the most important thing a woman can have - next to talent, of course - is her hairdresser.