I bet if you look at the average teenager and the average adult, the average teenager has read more books in the last year than the average adult. Now of course the adult would be all like, 'I'm busy, I got a job, I got stuff to do.' WHATEVER! READ! I mean, you're watching CSI: Miami. Why would you be watching CSI: Miami, when you could be READING CSI: Miami, the novelization?

When you’re as charming and physically attractive as myself, it’s easy enough to win over people you meet. But getting strangers to love you...now, that’s the trick.

That's how writing works, at least for me: even the stuff that doesn't work out gets funneled into the stuff that does work out.

Babies are made through an act that you will eventually find intriguing but for right now will just sort of horrify you, and also sometimes people do stuff that involves baby-making parts that does not actually involve making babies, like for instance kiss each other in places that are not on the face.

When we read the right book generously, it can change the way think about the world around us.

I'm so proud of you that it makes me proud of me. I hope you know that.

You realize that trying to keep your distance from me will not lessen my affection for you. All efforts to save me from you will fail.