But of course there is always a hamartia and yours is that oh, my God, even though you HAD FREAKING CANCER you give money to a company in exchange for the chance to acquire YET MORE CANCER.

How are the eyes?' 'Oh, excellent,' he said. 'I mean, they're not in my head is the only problem.

Do you guys remember that time when we were all definitely going to die and then Ben grabbed the steering wheel and dodged a ginormous freaking cow and spun the car like the teacups at Disney World and we didn't die?

Is it still cool to go to the mall?' she asked. 'I take quite a lot of pride in not knowing what's cool,' I answered.

He puts the killing thing in his mouth but doesn't give it the power to kill him.

The only thing worse than having a party that no one attends is having a party attended only by two vastly, deeply uninteresting people.

If people were like rain, I was like drizzle and she was a hurricane.