My type of humor is me not caring whether people know what I'm talking about or not.

Everything we make in life, eventually, is sold for a dollar or a penny or given away.

I would be good for maybe not the center square but an upper square on 'Hollywood Squares.'

Life may be miraculous in its unlikelihood in the universe, but it would be a fallacy to suggest that its rareness makes it inextinguishable.

As you know, the thing that I know the least about is the topic of sports.

I don't care if I tell that story and John Roderick gets up afterward and yells, 'I hope you enjoyed the white privilege, mortality comedy of John Hodgman!' That's me!" I'm going to play a sad Handsome Family song at the end and I guarantee you everyone is going to love it because, sometimes, you need a grown man or woman to tell you what you like.

A literary agent is nothing but a cheap salesman (or woman); while a writer is a cheap salesman (or woman) who also has to actually write the books.