Most people repent their sins by thanking God they ain't so wicked as their neighbors.
The secret of forgiving everything is to understand nothing.
Keep a cow, and then the milk won't have to be watered but once.
A good way I know to find happiness, is to not bore a hole to fit the plug.
Take the humbug out of this world, and you haven't much left to do business with.
The best creed we can have is charity toward the creeds of others.