Cordelia: I personally don't think it's possible to come up with a crazier plan. Oz: We attack the Mayor with hummus. Cordelia: I stand corrected. Oz: Just keeping things in perspective.

If I find out I have to write today and nothing else, that’s a perfect day. I know a lot of people who are great at it and make it look easy who are tortured and miserable people. Writing for me is perfect peace.

Half of writing history is hiding the truth.

We don't need heroes so much as recognizing ourselves as heroes.

I set out in television with one simple goal: to purchase a Russian bride. Didn't work out. Immigration stuff - it's complicated.

Writers are completely out of touch with reality. Writers are crazy [people]. We create conflict - for a living. We do this all the time, sometimes on a weekly basis, we create horrible, incredible circumstances and then figure a way out of them. That's what we do.

Actors wait tables, directors work at video stores.