Nicole Kidman in particular seems to bring out the butt-kisser in the sassiest of hackettes, as they ceaselessly strive to portray her as some sort of cross between Mother Teresa and Marilyn Monroe.

The latest twist on the pampering concept is spa parties, where a group of friends take over an entire spa.

And call me a pig, but isn't it brilliantly refreshing how early the Dutch eat dinner? When they're still laying out the cutlery in achingly hip Barcelona, they're hanging the Closed sign on the restaurant doors of old Amsterdam.

Covering up, so far as I can see, is often the accompaniment to far more truly shameful behaviour than stripping off.

Being a monarchist - saying that one small group is born more worthy of respect than another - is just as warped and strange as being a racist.

In my third husband I had discovered a blissfully laid-back type who thought it nothing less than hilarious when I misread the map on the way to Wales, so it took us an extra three hours, or when I was sick in a plastic carrier bag during much of the drive back from Devon - a bag that turned out to have a hole in it.

It's received wisdom that the English are uniquely child-unfriendly.