A snob is unreliable. The work he praises might just be good.

I have drawn from the well of language many a thought which I do not have and which I could not put into words.

Morality is a burglar's tool whose merit lies in never being left behind at the scene of the crime.

Morality is a venereal disease. Its primary stage is called virtue; its secondary stage, boredom; its tertiary stage, syphilis.

Education is what most receive, many pass on, and few possess.

There are writers who can express in as little as twenty pages what I occasionally need as many as two for.

To be perfect, one lacks only a defect.