They don't call me spontaneous and irreverant for nothing.
I don't believe in coincidence. I just think that all things work together for good.
People may be in awe of perfection, but they warm to humanity.
[On Regis Philbin:] He's like everybody's kid brother with his hand in the cookie jar and his foot in his mouth. You love him, but you can't take him anywhere.
Love in the real world means saying you're sorry 10 times a day.
Love someone too much to help them prevent making a mistake.