If I win, it's because of my natural ability and if I lose, it's because I wasn't trying so hard.

I always remind my kids, "I'm your parent, but I'm a human being, too, so I may not be perfect."

Women's clutches are too small. I open my purse, and with some hydraulic force, a tampon shoots 12 feet into the air.

If I feel any sort of emotional upheaval, I go for a jog and I feel better.

If I win, it's because of my natural ability and if I lose, it's because I wasn't trying so hard.

I think children are like pancakes. You sort of ruin the first one, and you get better at it the second time around.

Don't get divorced after your first argument! I have a lot of friends that have one fight and that's it, they get divorced. I go, 'Wait a minute! Oh my gosh, you guys! Calm down! You'll forget in three days what you were fighting about. I promise. So just let it marinate a little bit-that's my best love advice.