And the beer I had for breakfast wasn't bad, so I had one more for dessert

The world he saw was sadder than the one he hoped to find. But it wasn't near as lonesome as the one he left behind.

Jesus was a Capricorn, he ate organic foods, he believed in love and peace, and never wore no shoes.

Bad love is better than no love at all, at least you know you're alive.

I don't think I've gotten any smarter, but your reflexes slow down before you do something stupid when you're older.

The number-one rule of the road is never go to bed with anyone crazier than yourself. You will break this rule, and you will be sorry.

I want you to know I'm an Army brat; I was a captain in the Army and my brother was a jet pilot in the Navy. So I support our troops; I identify with them. But I sure as hell don't identify with the bastards who sent them over there.