I prefer your smiles and laughter, wife, but there are far worse things than your tears wetting my skin.

You want sweet dreams, lose the attitude and you might find I'll give you reason to have them.

Then she declared loudly, "Smoke break!" and everyone's eyes came to us, some of them shocked seeing as these days you could light up a doobie and no one would blink but if you lit up a smoke, you courted being publicly stoned to death.

You're pissed I laid it out and you're gonna go nurse your snit

Seriously, I don’t care if feminists hunt me down and burn me at the stake, that man crooked his finger at me, I’d follow him into a bank and rob it at his side.

Seriously. Who needed a real lover when you had a handsome, affectionate man who adored you, put a beautiful house over your head, gave you a great job, lavished you with fabulous clothes, shoes, purses and jewelry and would never break your heart?

Forgiveness is beautiful and it feels good when someone gives that gift to you. But it's one thing for someone you wronged to forgive you. It was another to forgive yourself.