Humor is an almost physiological response to fear.

Two radical ideas have been introduced into human thought. One of them is that energy and matter are pretty much the same sort of stuff. That's Einstein. The other is that revenge is a bad idea. Revenge is an enormously popular idea but, of course, Jesus came along with the radical idea of forgiveness. If you're insulted, you have to square accounts. So this invention by Jesus is as radical as Einstein's.

All right - I'll tell you what you did for me: you went for happy, silly, beautiful walks with me.

When I used to teach creative writing, I would tell the students to make their characters want something right away - even if it's only a glass of water. Characters paralyzed by the meaninglessness of modern life still have to drink water from time to time.

This is what I find encouraging about the writing trades: ... They allow lunatics to seem saner than sane.

The big trouble with dumb bastards is that they are too dumb to believe there is such a thing as being smart.

If God were alive today, He'd be an atheist.