Every character should want something, even if it is only a glass of water.

What a bummer it is to be a human being.

profanity and obscenity entitle people who don't want unpleasant information to close their ears and eyes to you.

Doesn't anything socialistic make you want to throw up? Like great public schools, or health insurance for all?

Aside from battles, the history of nations seemed to consist of nothing but powerless old poops like myself, heavily medicated and vaguely beloved in the long ago, coming to kiss the boots of young psychopaths.

Charm was a scheme for making strangers like and trust a person immediately, no matter what the charmer had in mind.

I realize that some of you may have come in hopes of hearing tips on how to become a professional writer. I say to you, "If you really want to hurt your parents, and you don't have the nerve to be a homosexual, the least you can do is go into the arts. But do not use semicolons. They are transvestite hermaphrodites, standing for absolutely nothing. All they do is show you've been to college.