I've often thought there ought to be a manual to hand to little kids, telling them what kind of planet they're on, why they don't fall off it, how much time they've probably got here, how to avoid poison ivy, and so on.

All these years, I've been opening the window and making love to the world.

Charm was a scheme for making strangers like and trust a person immediately, no matter what the charmer had in mind.

They say, you know, about evolution, it surely happened because their fossil record shows that. Look, my body and your body are miracles of design. Scientists are pretending they have the answer as how we got this way when natural selection couldn't possibly have produced such machines.

Human beings will believe in all kinds of things that aren't true, and that's okay. And TV is a part of that.

The truth is, we know so little about life, we don't really know what the good news is and what the bad news is.

War is now a form of TV entertainment, and what made the First World War so particularly entertaining were two American inventions, barbed wire and the machine gun.