Unhappy failures need not apply.

One of the few good things about modern times: If you die horribly on television, you will not have died in vain. You will have entertained us.

Humor is an almost physiological response to fear.

Thank God for novelists. Thank God there are people willing to write everything down. Otherwise, so much would be forgotten.

A lot of people were opposed to it. A lot of people were for it. I myself think about it as little as possible.

If it weren't for the message of mercy and pity in Jesus' Sermon on the Mount, I wouldn't want to be a human being. I would just as soon be a rattlesnake.

The world is full of people who are very clever at seeming much smarter than they really are.