Give the reader at least one character he or she can root for.

The worst thing that could possibly happen to anybody would be to not be used for anything by anybody. Thank you for using me, even though I didn't want to be used by anybody.

There's only one rule that I know of, babies—God damn it, you've got to be kind.

That’s the secret of artistic unity. Anybody can achieve it, if he or she will make something with only one person in mind.

Thanks to their decreased brainpower, people aren't diverted from the main business of life by the hobgoblins of opinion anymore.

No good at life, but very funny sometimes with the commentary.

If facts weren't funny, or scary, or couldn't make you rich, the heck with them.