Save it for my unauthorized autobiography.
Are you perchance running on a 64-bit machine?
The potential of greater good goes right along with the potential for greater evil.
[Perl] gives you the STDERR filehandle so that your program can make snide comments off to the side while it transforms (or attempts to transform) your input into your output.
Orthogonality for orthogonality's sake is not something I'm keen on.
Take Lisp, you know its the most beautiful language in the world -- at least up until Haskell came along.