Just what I needed—a necromancer with an attitude. Oh, wait, I was a necromancer with an attitude.

Questions are great, but only if you know the answers. If you ask questions and the answers surprise you, you look silly.

Sometimes you deal with the devil not because you want to, but because if you don't, someone else will.

I just don't believe in helping people who are going to torture me. Though I don't see any bamboo slivers. How can you possibly torture someone without bamboo slivers?

I hate women who complain about being fat when they're like a size 5. Anything under size 5 isn't a woman. It's a boy with breasts.

I try to be a good cop. I try to be a good little soldier and follow orders up to a point. But in the end I’m not really a cop, or a soldier. I am a legally sanctioned murderer. I am the Executioner.

When you spend all your time worrying that the devil is right behind you, eventually you start seeing him whether he's there or not.