Every ruler should strive for his people to love him. But if they cannot love you, then make them fear you. Love is better, but fear will do the job.

You either mellow at 30, or your head explodes - take your choice.

I sat on the bed. Neither of us said anything. I wasn't slick and sophisticated enough for this. What do you say to boyfriend A when he finds you naked in the bed of boyfriend B? Especially if boyfriend A turned into a monster the night before and ate someone. I bet Miss Manners didn't cover this at all.

That's what you get for telling the truth. Someone calls you a liar. Most people will accept a likely lie to an unlikely truth. In fact, they prefer it.

He's no more human than I am, ma petite." At least I'm not dead." That can be remedied.

Somehow I think Trophy Wives wear more makeup and less cutlery. But hey, I haven't ever met a Trophy Wife, maybe I'm wrong. Maybe they know what I know, that the true way to a man's heart is six inches of metal between his ribs.

You did not bring down two of the royal guard in an unceremonious heap because the woman in the middle tripped.