So I - the thought that I would physically be different was - it's not a thrill, I have to tell you. It's kind of - it brings you up short. But I was able to look at it right away.

They have - they do still hit me occasionally, and it's an overwhelming grief for what - even though my life is so good now, even including going through treatment for cancer, my life is incredible.

But I'm looking at life, and I'm putting nothing off.

I became the butterfly. I got out of the cocoon, and I flew.

I don't want marriage. You know why? Because I did that. I did it for 32 years.

I don't want to have to say, Honey, you know, could you turn off the sports channel because I'm not a big sports fan, and I don't love the television being on just for the sake of turning on. I'd like turning on for some thing specific.

I believe I have lots of time. I have to believe that, that it won't come back, and that that's why I'm in good hands. But I also do live my life by putting nothing off.